Glow Wild
Welcome to Glow Wild. I’m Nicole, mother to two and mother to a stage four cancer warrior, and this is the space where we talk honestly about pain, transformation, and the joy waiting on the other side. Through this podcast, I’m sharing my own story—what it means to keep going when life knocks you down and how hope can rise from the darkest times. If you’re hurting, grieving, or searching for light, you’re in the right place.
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Nicole
Glow Wild
Find Your Life's Mission Statement with Jessica Brodmerkel
What if the opposite of depression isn’t happiness—but purpose?
In this inspiring episode, Jessica Brodmerkel shares her journey from interior designer to certified personal trainer, author, and creator of The Balanced Athlete. With over 20 years of experience helping clients discover their gifts and create lives they love, Jessica reveals how tools like Ikegai and personal mission statements can transform not just your career, but your identity—especially for working moms and parents of teen athletes. We dive into how living your purpose can prevent burnout, guide your teens by example, and help you thrive in every season of life.
Find Jessica on Instagram: @jessiebrodmerkel
Book a discovery call with Jessie: CLICK HERE
Books we discussed in this episode:
The Change Your Thoughts Change Your Life
Wabisabi
Don't Keep Your Day Job
Atomic Habits
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Hi, I'm Nicole and you're listening to Glow Wild. Hey guys, so today this episode of Glow Wild is brought to you by Noka Organics, a brand that's not just in my pantry, but in my heart. When my daughter Parker was battling stage four cancer, she literally survived on Noka smoothie pouches. And I mean, they were one of the only things she could keep down. And now I can't keep them on the shelf at home. She loves them so much. She has them every morning. And honestly, so do I. Whether I'm running errands, hitting the trail, or chasing purpose, Noka is always in my bag. Each pouch is packed with organic fruits and veggies, plant protein, healthy fats from flax, and superfoods like camu camu and maca. They're shelf-stable, dairy-free, gluten-free, and have no added sugar. Just clean, powerful nutrition. If you want to fuel your day with something you can feel good about, head to nokahorganics.com forward slash Glow Wild. That's N-O-K-A organics.com forward slash Glow Wild. And use the code Glow Wild at checkout for 15% off your order. Try them out. You might just fall in love like we did. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to Glow Wild. where we explore the intersection of purpose, healing, and wholehearted living. Today's episode is for anyone who's ever asked, is this it? For anyone who's juggling schedules, raising kids, building careers, and still longing for something deeper, something that feels aligned. I am thrilled to welcome Jessica Brodmerkel to the show today, an inspiring coach, communicator, athlete, author, and mom who has built a life of business around the one powerful idea that the opposite of depression isn't happiness, it's purpose. Jessica knows firsthand that being a working mom is no easy feat. Between carpools, Zoom meetings, sports practices, and everything in between, we are constantly making tough decisions. But what if those decisions could be guided by a personal mission statement? What if we showed our kids that living with purpose is the most powerful way to thrive. After pivoting from a successful interior design career into the world of fitness and wellness back in 2005, Jessica followed her calling, even when it meant starting over. Since then, she's helped countless clients rediscover their gifts, align their lives with their values, and build purpose-driven paths forward. Jessica is the founder of Balance Beyond Burnout and The Balanced Athlete. offering transformative programs that help both parents and teen athletes find balance, prevent burnout, and create lives they actually love. She's also a newly published author. Her heartfelt book about being a volleyball mom launched in March, and the paperback version is coming out this August. It's a must read for any parent navigating the emotional rollercoaster of youth sports and self-discovery, which I know all too well. In this conversation, we dive into personal mission statements, and how to model purpose for our kids and ourselves. Jessica reminds us that we are not just employees, caretakers, or chauffeurs. We are whole people with passions, gifts, and potential. So if you have ever felt like you were made for more, if you're curious how to pivot without shame, and you want to live, not just survive, this one precious life, then this episode is your permission slip. Let's get into it with the brilliant and purpose-fueled Jessica Rodmerkel. Well, welcome, Jessica, to the Glow Wild podcast. I'm really excited that you're here. I already gave our listeners a little intro describing what you do and how you left your career, but if you have anything else to share, we'd love to hear it.
SPEAKER_00:Sure. Well, first of all, I'm so excited to be on your podcast. I've been listening to you, and I think you are just a phenomenal human being. Oh, my gosh. Thank you so much. No, I mean, I've been telling my friends, I'm like, oh my gosh, this woman, she has lived like a thousand lives in her short life. And you just have the persistence and passion and mission that
SPEAKER_01:I just, I think you're amazing. Oh, that is so kind. Thank you so much for that. Yes, of course. But I want to hear about you because what you do is so inspiring. The big leap you took in changing careers. Yeah, just you tell us about you. So,
SPEAKER_00:you know, there's a lot of like bits and pieces, I think, with all of us, you know, that lead us into a certain direction. And my inspiration growing up was my grandmother. And she, so I'll tell you a little bit about her story first, because she's my mentor, was my mentor, and just kind of is what keeps me motivated to live my mission and my passion. So she, growing up, she actually contracted TB of the spine. Oh, my God. And I guess that is called Pott's disease. And so when I was younger, I listened to these stories about her life as a child. She was probably, I think, around five years old when this happened. And she told me they took part of her femur and kind of lost in the disease. And... but she couldn't walk. And so they carted her to and from school on a red wagon. Oh my gosh. On a board. So we'd go to school and be like all the other kids. And at some point during that time, they created this like lying down on desk, but she's prone on her stomach. Oh, wow. And there's like a writing surface for her to write on. And the crazy thing is, I've been telling this story and it's just kind of a part of my story now, you know, and my mom the other day found an article with a picture of her on that desk. And it's just, Oh, wow. Yeah. Wow, I'm
SPEAKER_01:very excited to hear about it. I mean, what a life as a young child. That's crazy, but I love that article title, Looking to the Future with a Smile. Yeah. That's huge. Yeah. Sorry to interrupt. Keep going, please.
SPEAKER_00:I'm sure you can kind of relate to this. You will never walk. You will never have children. You will never play sports. You know, they gave her all of these stories that were not her story. They were their story and her prognosis. And Let me tell you. She... Not only did she walk, she played sports. She was, like, low-level, with either her own, like, softball.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I love that so much. I love that movie. Oh, my God.
SPEAKER_00:Sure, she... When she was in her 40s, she learned how to play golf and walked the entire golf course every day after work. And she had four children.
SPEAKER_01:So she beat everyone's expectations and proved them wrong, which I love a story like that. And you're right. I think we've all lived, in some way, exceeded expectations that we don't even realize. So what a wonderful story that she... inspired you and was she kind of the pivotal or the reason why you felt so confident taking that lead from interior designer to being in the health and wellness arena? I
SPEAKER_00:think so, you know, just knowing how she lived her life and kind of one thing. She died when she was 93, by the way. Wow.
SPEAKER_01:So she lived a long, healthy, amazing life. That's great.
SPEAKER_00:Right. And she died. She passed away about two years ago, which was way after I decided to take that leap. But that definitely seed for me, just by how important it is to live out your purpose and your vision and live your story and not somebody else's story for you. And, you know, One of her final conversations with me was, she called me Jessie. She said, Jessie, I'm not afraid to die. I have lived a long life and I've done everything that I wanted to do and I'm at peace with this. Isn't that all of our wish?
SPEAKER_01:Our wish, yeah. Not having regrets or I wish I had. You said something really important. I want to go back to it. It was about you being in charge of... I can't remember now because I was listening to the story so deeply. I tend to do that. What was her advice to you? It was so profound. I just wanted the listeners to hear it one more time.
SPEAKER_00:Of course, yeah. You know, I think it's just, it's so important to create your own story. That's it, yep. Know your purpose. You know, if you know your purpose and you don't even know your story. I love that. It seems that... she did. And she didn't listen to those other stories that the doctors told her when she was younger or that other people told her throughout her life. She, she knew who she was
SPEAKER_01:and what she was meant to do. I think the message inspired me. Yeah, that's huge. And it's just so important that we understand we, if we believe we can do it, we can. And it, I know that's such a simple saying, and we hear it all the time, but to see her story, to see your story, to see my own, I mean, it's true. If you really do believe, you can make it happen. But I want to talk to you. Something that you said was the opposite of depression isn't happiness. It's knowing and living your purpose. So we've already kind of covered purpose and all of that. Can you take us back to the moment in your life when you first felt that truth? Was it with your grandmother?
SPEAKER_00:me so this is when I decided to change my career so all growing up you know I wanted to be an interior designer and I did I did my internship with interior design I worked for a high furniture store as an interior designer like in general you know they would purchase the furniture and I would design their homes for them and it was great but I knew there was something missing and You know, I think if you're not letting your purpose get down on yourself, you can question yourself. And then there was also this struggle with my pride of like, I didn't want to be that person that went to college for one thing. It's not all about money and the blood, sweat, tears. Yeah. Yeah. Getting your degree and then changing your career. Well, it's also very scary to do that. And so, you know, growing up, I was a teen athlete. I was a high-performing teen athlete, and I lived in Northern Indiana, and my parents got divorced, and then we ended up moving to Oklahoma the Christmas break of my sophomore year of high school, and that kind of changed the trajectory of just my sports career and things like that, and But I think, you know, going through that, I ended up having that background with sports and having that background, you know, just being an athlete. And then my college job, while I was going to school for interior design, I actually was a gymnastics coach at the gym that Shanna Miller went to. Oh, wow. Her coach opened up. And so that really planted a seed, too, in me, just like for the passion of coaching and the passion of... just helping people reach their goals and high levels of what they're wanting to achieve. And so in 2005, after doing interior design for a while, I was really struggling with wanting to change and become a personal trainer, but struggling with that pride thing, you know? Oh, yeah, definitely. Should I do this? And a friend of mine gave me a book that... just talked about figuring out your personal mission, figuring out your mission statement. And so I sat down for the first time, and I wrote out my personal mission statement. And at the time, I was working at a commercial furniture store, you know, with tables and desks, and I was actually the designer there doing auto-cad drawings. And I would get done with my work, and I would be forwarded out of my mind. Oh, I can imagine. Yeah. And I didn't like sitting behind the desk. And so I would do my job and then I just find myself walking like slaps around the showroom floor. And so one day in 2005, after I discovered what my personal mission was, I went to my boss and I just empowered me. Oh, I love that. To say, you know what, I am, I love, you know, I love the opportunity here, but I have discovered that It doesn't align with my personal mission.
SPEAKER_01:And would you mind sharing that mission statement with us? What you came up with from reading this book and maybe what the book title is?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. And so my first one is a little bit different. And that's something also that I want to kind of share with you is, you know, your personal mission statement is going to change in about time, depending on the seasons of your life. I can tell you it's very in line with my current personal mission statement. And my current personal mission statement is we find ourselves creating things, empowering others, moving physically, and shaping our environment. I help others to create a life, a long journey of wealth and longevity. And it was very similar back then to what it is now. And I found a picture of the index card I wrote it on, and I used to tape it up in my notebook. once I became a personal trainer. And now it just, you know, I don't have it. I figured
SPEAKER_01:this out. No, no, I love, I love that though. So give us a reason or like what the process was like going from being an interior designer. Did you quit immediately and start working towards becoming a personal trainer or was it a long slogging process
SPEAKER_00:and personal vision statement down and knowing that it was such an easy choice for me to leave. So that day, like after probably my 10th lap around the floor, I was like, you know what? I am going to turn my two weeks notice in. Oh, wow. Have a job lined up. I did have my, I had just got my, I had got my, or was my personal training certification. And I was about to take the test for that. And so I I gave them my two weeks notice. And, you know, it's really kind of a universe kind of work sometimes. I had worked for a, it was like a wholesale interior design place for the commercial design. And so I designed this room for four interior designers to come in and say, oh, I like that. I like that. I want that for my client, you know, and so forth. And I had left that because they were paying like peanuts. So at that same time, The owner of that place called me back and said, hey, we'd really like for you to come work for us at this time. So I'm feeling really confident and I've got this pension statement. And I don't know if you can relate to this, but I am a people pleaser. I just want to be smooth. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings. I don't want to let anybody down. I
SPEAKER_01:hear you. I think it's harshly our generation. I assume we're around the same age. And just that people pleasing, especially as a woman, it's a hard thing to go through life because you don't want to let anyone down. And of course, as you've been kind of recruited to this position, you feel like you're letting someone down. I'm sure that was tough.
SPEAKER_00:But, you know, having this personal mission statement, I remember looking him in the eyes and saying, I really appreciate this opportunity, but it does not align with my personal mission statement. And I'm actually really excited about going into the fitness industry right now and, you know, becoming a personal trainer. trainer. And you know what, Nicole, he looked at me, and I think a lot of people try to steer you into following their stories. Oh, yeah. And he said, well, you're never going
SPEAKER_01:to make enough money in that field or that industry. Interesting. That was my next question, because I know you mentioned that in the information that you sent me. How did you respond to that at the time? And did that invoke fear in you? I
SPEAKER_00:think I had so, I was so empowered and I was so confident because of creating this personal mission statement that I just said, you know what? I don't believe that. And I'm really passionate about this. So it's actually not about the money. It's about living on my mission.
SPEAKER_01:That is huge. I love that. Right. You can't change your identity, your purpose, your mission. So I love that. Yeah. So many women, we're kind of talking about this already, but especially moms, tie their identity to their job or their parenting role. And how did your identity shift as your child grew or your children grew when you started creating the Balanced Athlete?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so because of this, because of creating the Balanced Athlete program, I teach that it's not about the titles. And like you're saying, I think it's so... Like, we can get so caught up in titles. But really, we're not titles. Even Mom. Like, I... You know, the title of Mom. I mean, we all are proud of that. I mean, that is just like... probably one of the you know the titles that we're so proud of oh what like how does that describe you it doesn't really anybody like what kind of mom are you like what do you do what does that mean who is your kids and even you know as like an author of you know the volleyball book it's like yeah author but really I go back to my first submission statement and I I am a creator. I create things. I empower people. I shape environments. I move physically. You know, I'm a verb. I'm a title. It's what we contribute back to the world of us. And I think that's what our mission statement helps us with. And that's what I help teach, you know, the athletes and the team athletes and their parents is just, it is so important. Can you imagine, like, what we're talking about? I think The opposite of happiness is knowing your purpose. So if people know their purpose, they know their mission. Can you imagine what this world could be like? Oh, I
SPEAKER_01:know. And I do feel very lucky, but I also know that I worked for it to find that purpose. I had terrible things happen to me. I could have crawled into a hole. And I love speaking with you because you also... found that purpose and what would you say and what do you say to people that you work with who are really struggling to even come up with a mission statement or to find something that they're passionate about or you know what drives them
SPEAKER_00:yeah and so with the ballast athlete program i help i help them create their personal mission statement i have a process that i that I personally worked through to create mine that I guide them to work through to create theirs. And part of it is just finding their strengths. I help them kind of pick out their five key strengths or gifts, if you will. And then we use those gifts to create that written personal mission statement and we put it on paper. And it becomes, you know, I mean, it helps kind of balance you and ground you and takes you back. Anytime you're feeling like you've got to please somebody else or somebody else is telling you their story of you, you can go back to that personal mission statement and say, no, this is who I am. This is what my strengths are. This is what my gifts are. And it helps you say yes or no to things. You know, for me, it helped me say yes or no to the right kinds of career paths from teen athletes. I read an article the other day that there is actually... kind of something that's happening with teen athletes and identity crisis because once they're finished with their sports or they're finished with college and maybe they're going to college for the scholarship for their sport, right? As soon as they're in there, they're like, now who am I? Absolutely. You are more than that athlete. You are more than the football player. You are more than the cheerleader. You are more than the volleyball player. There's so much more. You have so many gifts and talents that I love to have. Not discover, but uncover. Right. I
SPEAKER_01:really like that because it applies to everyone. It's not just the teen athlete. Maybe it's someone who, like you, is switching careers and they're like, now what? Or they lost a job. Now what? I mean, unless you really sit down and go over your values, your gifts, your talents, what's important to you, you're not moving forward. You're kind of just stuck. And I see that. a lot with so many people I know. You just want to shake them and say, you have so much to offer. Why aren't you doing it? You have to be kind. They may not know. I just love this. Tell us more about the balanced athlete. Once you became a personal trainer, I want to hear the whole framework. We went over a little bit of it, like how you unlock or I'm sorry, uncover their gifts and talents. I love that. Yeah, yeah. Tell us more about the Balanced Athlete and where you work out of, who you serve. Is it countrywide? And then I want to talk about your book after this.
SPEAKER_00:Sure, sure, sure. Yeah, so I actually, full disclosure, I do have a 9-to-5 job. I'm a communications analyst. There's my title. Oh! But I actually, before I became... that title there. I ran out of there for a fitness center for a decade. And I went to work for the YMCA for a little while. And then they opened this position with the communications analyst position that also is like the events coordinator or sort of got the events team and things like that. And so I went back in that role. So I am currently working a nine to five writing. Imagine that. I get it. Welded. corporate wellness and things like that. But I am building this coaching business because this is my passion and this is my mission. And I keep telling people, like, my passion is helping you. My passion and purpose is helping you figure out your passion and purpose. And so I do have on Instagram, you can find me at Justine Rodmerkel. And I have a Calendly link on my bio where you can schedule sessions A free, I'm calling it just like a clarity call type situation. But then for the two programs that I offer, one is Vision Statements Bootcamp, and it's for parents and their teen athletes to schedule. It's a 90-minute call with me. And we sit down, and that's where we do uncover and bring forth, figure out the five gifts and create that personal mission statement for the athlete and the parent. Because, you know, as parents, too, and, you know, I am a parent of a teen athlete, and this is kind of where this is all stemming from. Yeah. You are so busy. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. taxi driver.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, that's how I feel. Right. My kids are only five and six and one of them's already on a competitive gymnastics team and the hours of training, I mean, it's six hours a week, two times a week and then you have the weekends and And yeah, I just feel like a cab driver. And it's like where, I don't want to lose myself in that because I love being a mom, but I'm not just a mom. You're not just a mom. We have our own mission. And that's really cool that you work with the parents as well. And of course, I'll link all of this information in the show notes so that people can find you. What's the power in helping both parents and teens discover their purpose together? Like what have you found that that really... uncovers for them?
SPEAKER_00:That is a great question. So, you know, as parents, I think we want to be great mentors to our children. You know, we teach them, but we also want to be you know, good examples. And so if we don't know what our passion and our purpose is, or if our kiddos see us, all we're doing is driving around and, you know, that's what they see us as. They don't realize that, oh wait, my parent is a human being too. And they have dreams and they have desires. You know, I think that's so important for us to understand to show them and be examples of that. And then I have, it's been so, so cool because some of the families that I have done the personal mission statement food camp with me, it's just really neat to uncover. For instance, I have a Brown family, and they have a son who is a tennis player. And he is a senior. He's just about to be a senior in high school. And then a daughter that is actually my daughter's age. They're about to be freshmen in high school. And she's a dancer. And the... dad is a firefighter and the mom has a school teacher. And so they all sat down, they all did submission statement bootcamp together. And it was so neat because the daughter and the dad had similar strengths and like characteristics. Interesting. Uncovered it all. And then the son and the mom has similar characteristics and strengths. And I don't think they ever really thought about that before, but you know, once we all like discovered it and we were talking about it, they're like, oh yeah, that makes sense. Oh yeah, that checks out. Yeah. And It was so cool. And it really just solidified for the parents, both of them. You know, they're like, oh, yeah, I am in my right profession. You know, I am using my gifts and talents in what I'm doing. And I am passionate about what I'm doing. And then for the kiddos, it was kind of cool. We actually used ChatGPT. And I said, okay, apply your strengths. you know, in your instant chat GPT and see what it comes up with. Oh, how I know like career choices or options it throws out at you.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, that's really creative. I love that. I never would have thought to do that. Like plug in your talents. That's huge. That's helpful. What did they find?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. You know, there were some things that he was just like, oh, yeah, I never really thought about that before. Oh, yeah. And then some things, you know, of course, with Chachi, he was like, oh, no, that's way off. Oh, totally. Yeah. I could tell, like, he got the wheels turning and he was just like, okay, this is, you know, really true. And then the daughter, she already was very interested in becoming a physical therapist. And so she was, like, set on that. And she said, yes, my strength. And that was one of the things that it did both of us. Oh, that's awesome.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I know. We can't totally trust AI. Oh, it's so helpful. There is a line in your story that really hit me and it was why wait until the kids move out or wait until retirement to do the things you love. What do you think stops most people from choosing joy and purpose right now and And how do you guide them past those blocks?
SPEAKER_00:So I think, especially as moms or especially as parents, we're focused on our kids. We're focused on everybody else. And we tend to put our needs and our goals and our vision on the back burner. But that doesn't have to happen. You know, I think you can build on that and start figuring that out now and work that into little bits and pieces into your life. in certain ways that like maybe even if you are in a corporate job maybe you can start tracking like in a flow journal once you know what you're once you uncover your gifts and strengths you know what they are so now start journaling you know maybe journal moments throughout the day at the end of the day that you felt flow and when I talk about flow that is like where you lose track of time because you're so immersed in the activity that you're doing and And you're just enjoying life at that moment. Oh, absolutely. For those who want to remember, I'm like, I have no idea. Oh,
SPEAKER_01:totally. This gives me so much energy. I'm excited to do it. I'm like, really excited. you know, just losing track of time when I'm working on it. But also I've noticed that with painting my entire life, I forget to breathe even because I'm so immersed in what I'm doing. So I understand that. And I love that you tell people to look for those activities that, you know, really get them in the flow. And they felt just the way we do when we're helping others. So that's awesome.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. you know, you're not present. And so it helps you to become a little bit more present with what you're doing. It helps you kind of connect the dots and figure out, you know, maybe what time of day it is or the people that you're around when you're finding flow or the, again, the activity that you're doing. And then it allows you to maybe start incorporating little bits of that into your day and to try to build upon that and not wait until, I think just in our Western society, culture oh there's so many things oh I know I know like for one you know what if this what I'm doing was filled into our schools you know it would be huge external and extrinsic in our schools and and not that I'm not I'm not saying that that's not important like we need to be smart people we need to be educated but I think it I think sometimes we forget the intrinsic motivation and to look internally and that sounds so woo woo you know no it really doesn't but it I mean we are human beings we have feelings but get that and so to look inward and figure out your purpose along with learning the education piece and connecting that
SPEAKER_01:is so important I agree completely and I don't know if you had thought about it or it sounds like you have but What if you brought your framework into the schools and maybe asked if there was a way for them to incorporate it into some kind of class? Because I think overall education needs to be reformed. There's too much access to information now, which we didn't have before. And, you know, reading, I think, is the most important thing that kids should learn in school. Math, if you're going into engineering and all of that. But if you're not... We need more of that purpose-driven education that you're talking about. And it would be interesting if you spoke with schools and got involved in teaching more than just the athletes.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, absolutely. It is on my, it is off my radar, on my to-do list. I'm a little intimidated, I'm not going to lie. It's just like how I get my foot in the doors with that, you know. Oh, I understand. And, you know, things, it has to go
SPEAKER_01:through that. you know, the state probably. Right. Yeah. Maybe even to the head in Washington. Yeah. But how cool. Well, I get that. It's daunting, but I think it would be very, very exciting for, you know, our country and just the way we look at our lives. I do too. I want to look or talk about your book and when you wrote it, what motivated you to write it and anything else you can share? Sure, sure.
SPEAKER_00:So I would start with, back when I was running the corporate fitness center for the company that I work for now, I've always loved writing. I mean, I even found like old calls, you know? Oh, I love that. Yeah. Same, same. And so I've just always loved writing and just creating. I mean, that's one of my gifts. And And so back when I was running the corporate fitness center, I thought, okay, something to write a book and then write a book about corporate wellness. And I did like, I wrote it all out. I had this rough draft and I never did anything with it. And I was, you know, like, Yeah, I don't know. When you write a book and you publish it, it's like you're standing naked in front of everybody. You're so vulnerable. I know. So scary.
SPEAKER_01:Girl, the podcast is the same. I was terrified, mostly of people I knew instead of... It's so weird. Yeah, I know. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00:That was it. So then I went to work for the YMCA. My boss there, we were still really good friends, and she is one of the coolest people I know. And I had told her about it. She said it to me, and she was just always so encouraging about everything that I do. And I never really did anything with it. And so then, my daughter came to me one day, you know, fast forward to like two years ago, almost three years ago now. My daughter came to me, and she was about to be in seventh grade, and she's a freshman now. She said, Mom, I want to try out for volleyball. And I never played volleyball. I was attracted to cross country. I meant to ask you what your sport was. Okay. It was... But my sisters played volleyball, but this was a long time ago. Yes, they did, I guess. But I do not remember them having a tryout for their school ball team. And there definitely wasn't any club volleyball at that time. All
SPEAKER_01:right, I'm going to interrupt you there because when I was a freshman, it must have been in 2000. I had to try out for the volleyball team. I had played in middle school thinking I was, you know, the shit. No, it was me and my best friend. We're both very athletic and another girl that got cut. And I was devastated, embarrassed. And it actually brought me to cross country running because you didn't have to try out. And so we have that in common. I did cross country and track. Sorry, please. continue on but yeah the tryouts they seem they are stressful and they can be quite defeating
SPEAKER_00:yeah and so this was kind of the first thing that my daughter like she did a little bit of gymnastics but it was kind of clear that she wasn't gonna get to move yeah but to dance and stay with people and stay with soccer and so anyway she cussed up to me she's like I want to do this and we had played there's a called i9 sports I don't know if you've ever heard of it look at it worked with school systems and it's recreational. It's kind of like the YFTA. And so she did like 12 weeks of that. And it's just like parents volunteering to coach. And so we had a parent volunteer and she was a wonderful human being and it's super nice but it was clear she had never touched a volleyball in her life oh no she went from that to her trying out for school ball and it was a four day tryout in the summertime and my father-in-law had to take her because we work and so she went to these and then at the time that was actually when my grandmother was had started to get sick with breast cancer at 93 in the last day of her tryouts, I had, I had to go up there to Indiana. And so she was here with my husband and they took her to tryouts and, you know, they post, they post like a size of numbers and they post the numbers on the door of who wins. And also, let me just say, there were 113 girls trying. Oh my
SPEAKER_01:gosh.
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Well, that's better for the ones who don't make it because they don't feel as bad when you're one of three like I was. Oh my gosh, but that was still hard. It sounds like she made it.
SPEAKER_00:No. Oh, she didn't? No, she didn't. Oh, shoot. So, that's great. She did not make the team, and she called me while I was up there balling.
SPEAKER_02:Oh.
SPEAKER_00:So, we had a conversation, and the conversation was like, of course, I had to pull out, like, the Michael Jordan. Hey, guess what? And she goes, Michael Jordan. I says, good, good.
SPEAKER_01:It's cool. Oh, that's something I didn't know about him. That's good to know. Yeah. That's powerful. Okay, that's really good for you guys to hear. Michael Jordan did not make his high school basketball team, and he became one of the greatest of all time. So that's a huge message. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I told her that, you know, she's like, okay. And then we talked, and it was like, okay. do you want to try out again next year? Yes. And so I said, okay, let's do some research. Let's figure out, you know, I've heard there's club volleyball. I don't know what that looks like. We can do that. We can look into some, you know, one-on-one sessions. We can sign up for some leagues in the summertime. And we'll just, you know, work on our game. And then you can try out parades, right? And she was all about that. She was like, okay, let's do it. And so this time came, we ended up doing like a six-week summer league. And then she tried out for, club, competitive ball, and she made the team. And so that was exciting. She knew so much from that. And then she tried out for her eighth grade team the next year, and she made it. How wonderful. They had... I think that year there was like an in-conference and an out-of-conference. JV at RC for G. She likes an in-conference and an out-of-conference. And she wrote JV's conference. So she was pretty proud of herself. I was proud of her for just putting in the work and having the grit and the motivation to keep on trying. And so that gave her confidence boost. And that first year club... I didn't know what I was getting into. I mean, it is a whole other world out there. Oh, wow. The trials are crazy. Yeah. The fees are crazy. The travel is crazy. Oh, my gosh. It comes to your life. Yeah. So, I just bought it. I mean, it motivated me to write this book. And actually, so... as we were, you know, in the middle of this experience, I was just journaling. Again, I liked to write and journaling little notes, like a POV, like my point of view, blah, blah, blah, you know, blah, blah, blah. notes in a book. And I became friends, of course, with some moms on the sidelines, you know, from the other girls on the team. And at the end of that club season, you know, we would make comments like, oh, that needs to go in the book. Oh, somebody needs to write a book. That needs to go in the book. Oh, that needs to go in the book.
SPEAKER_01:So I love this, that you were sharing your idea to write this book and you were getting feedback. And it sounds like they were interested. So you kind of knew it was, you know, something people wanted to hear. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Well, it started out kind of with a joke. Totally. I didn't see that. Yeah. Like, I'm sure I'll write the book. And then the end of the season, I compiled all of my notes. And all of the little comments were the base that, you know, they were saying, oh, that needs to go into the book. That needs to go into the book. And I just made, like, a very, very rough, like, word document type book. And I emailed it to the guys. They said, yes, ladies, I made the book. Oh, I love it. Yeah, and so they read it. It is a very short book. It's only like 48 pages long, I think. And so they said, Giles, you should really actually publish them. It can help other parents just like as a guide, you know. Right. And kind of like keep them laughing along the way. And so I did. And so that was kind of my rough draft. And I would wake up early in the morning. Back to your morning episode. Yes. I'm
SPEAKER_01:glad. Yeah, I know. Mornings have... I honestly, I used to... I could sleep in till noon before. And now that I've made it a routine and a habit, I really just naturally wake up at 5.15. It's wonderful. And it really gives you that creative time. Yes, and that's my favorite part. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So I did. I used that time to just... I'll add a little bit more to it, you know, update it, make edits, so things like that. And then I decided to add, so right now it's an e-book. I actually, my designer is the husband. He formatted it for me. Oh, great. We're getting ready to format the paperback. I'm hoping to have pre-orders by September 1st. Oh, that's so exciting. Yeah, we'll publish that for the paperback. Hopefully right around my club season for the developmental league startup, at least in our region in October.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I'm sure that will hit home for so many families who have children in sports, but not just volleyball, but kind of everything. They're all very similar with the amount of time we invest and all the sideline stuff that we have to deal with. But I want to talk now about your husband and your wife. relationship. It sounds like he is a designer or is he just really good at that? Okay. Okay.
SPEAKER_00:Those are bias. Well, that's great. That's awesome. Well, this mate left his job as I didn't know. So I got my freelancing, you know, pieces here and there. And then, of course, all of my crazy ideas. Yes, I love that. Oh, babe, it's time for the paperback.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, here we go. So when you developed your mission statement, did you sit down with him and say, hey, what's yours? I mean, how did that kind of come into your relationship and how did it affect your relationship?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah. That's very logical. So he has promised me that he's going to sit down and take my mission statement at boot camp, and he has it to do it.
SPEAKER_01:We're staying there. I have asked my husband to do a life coaching session with me, and he has yet to do it, too. So here we are.
SPEAKER_00:100% supportive of everything I've ever felt. He's my rock. That's great. Yeah. fine, crazy, no fun, like, idyllic, cynic. He's usually the one that's like, hey, what do you think about this idea? Does it sound too crazy? Or, you know, it's the statement that I've heard through all of this and putting the book and putting the, you know, balanced out, if anybody can do it, maybe you can do it. Oh,
SPEAKER_01:that is wonderful. It's so great to have a supportive partner. Yeah. I know I come up to my husband, Corey, with a lot of crazy ideas all the time because my mind moves just so quickly that, you know, at this point, I'm sure he always was supportive before, but at this point, he's like, are you sure? Yep, whatever you want to do, you go do it. Yeah, but that is great to have someone.
SPEAKER_00:It's important to have kind of that person that is not afraid to tell you the truth. Oh, totally, yeah. Yeah. of my daughter, Suzanne, and do the mission statement boot camp. Oh, awesome. You know what, Nicole? That was certainly interesting because, especially through her, like, first year, I think, first year of club ball and school ball, she's just this easy-peeled, like, personality. I'm kind of like this social butterfly. Right. That's kind of pretty easy-peeled, too. So I guess she didn't represent. But it was hard to, like, tell if she really wanted it, you know, just by her language or just by her expressions and things like that. And we sat down and we did this personal mission statement, and one of her strengths, so one of the things that she takes that's important to her is getting things right. Oh. So we're going to tell the teenager, like, oh, really, getting things right is important to you, huh? Interesting, yeah. Good to know. But... What that told me was, I think sometimes the way we took these, it was her like feeling like she wanted to get into it, right? And maybe not meeting her own expectations and kind of like a perfectionist situation. And so we were just reading it wrong. Right. And so knowing that is one of her strengths or one of her, you know, values, right? That changed everything for me, like, just how I was saying it and how I was communicating to her. You know, we would try to have these car, and I think probably all sports parents can relate to this, like, you have these conversations in the car, right? And I'm like, okay, tell me, like, what are you wanting to do? You know, like, what is your goal? Like, What are you trying to do out there? Where you work? What are you getting at your best? And you're kind of almost like adding to their stress. Oh, totally. Like another coach. They don't need another coach. They need support. And so those conversations after having that statement on it with her, they changed. And I ended up asking her, okay, so what is your goal for this practice? Hey, what... Today, what's your goal for this tournament? What are you wanting to achieve? And she was saying, well, I want to make, I just want to do my best and I want to try to get the best, you know, sets to my pastors or to my outside or whatever her goal was for that time. Yeah. Afterwards, oh, let's bring it up. That's great. and then i would ask her okay on a scale of one to ten you know so one being like you give me to step it up ten being like you're amazing you're going to the olympics where you feel like you hit that goal and you know sometimes she'll be like oh well it's a five or six or sometimes she'll be like it was a nine and so it has really changed the dynamics of our conversations and i've That's great. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I think your work just would be so important, not just for teen athletes, but for parents and their children to communicate more effectively, just like you found when you did the bootcamp with your daughter. So let's talk about people that you've struggled with. Maybe there's one person that sticks out where they couldn't come up with talents or values or anything? How did you kind of guide them towards discovering those or uncovering those, as you say?
SPEAKER_00:So I haven't had that situation come up. Let's pretend. Yeah. But I would say like everybody has strengths. And I think the method that I use is I basically have a That's going to make it sound really cheesy, but you don't know. For lack of a better term, it's like a theme field card, right? Okay. Because you had asked me this, and I actually sailed to mention that this is available for anyone. We do a Zoom call. If that's somebody that's local or is a friend or, say, a teenager or TP's parents or whatever, I can be a better person for sure. But most of the time, Zoom is going to be the modality. And so... I have a Beagle card that I sent to them and it has these strengths, kind of some very common strengths on there, about 32 of them. And so I asked them to go through that and choose from those what their
SPEAKER_01:strengths are. Oh, that is not cheesy at all. It's very helpful. It gives them a place to start where, you know, the way I was envisioning the process is, you know, just Write down your strengths. And even for myself, I have a hard time because I am hard on myself. I'm not a perfectionist, but, you know, people pleaser. I have a hard time talking about my own strengths or even recognizing them. So I love that idea that you give them a bingo light card. That's huge. It's such a good starting off point.
SPEAKER_00:I know, as well. It's not like automatically say, okay, take your fly, but I need to, because that's overwhelming, too. Oh, totally. Yeah. Okay, this class, two minutes to pick all of the strengths that Yes. And still worry about the ones, you know, that are not enough. Right. They create this list, you know, and then, okay, now you've got one minute to narrow this down to your top ten. You know, okay, now you've got one minute to narrow it down to your top five. But it's so fun. Yeah. Do a little narrowing process and turn it into a little bit of a game. But having a timer on it keeps you from overthinking. Right. because it's so easy to, oh, yeah, well, I'm trying to do this, and this is kind of my strength, maybe at work, but maybe not so much at home, or maybe it's my strength on my team, but maybe not as sinful, or, yeah, and so, you know, it just, it keeps you from over-linking and using your gut and safe, and good, and right, and word, and I love,
SPEAKER_01:love, love that approach. That is very cool. Okay, I just need to know So you wanted to be a personal trainer, like coaching gymnastics, you're realizing your mission statement, but how did you come up with this whole body program? Like what sparked in you that was like, this is how I'm going to do it. This is what's important. I'm just like very curious. It's so fascinating.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I mean, so at least since 2005, just figuring out your personal mission statements and, I think as a personal trainer, you know, you have to be really good at seeing the potential in people. And your job is, yeah, you're helping them get in shape, yes, you're helping them lose weight, yes, you're helping them meet their fitness goals. But really, ultimately, you are seeing their potential and you are helping them get from point A to Right.
SPEAKER_01:And
SPEAKER_00:you can envision that for them, even when they can't envision it themselves. I don't know. I've just been fascinated with helping people get from point A to point B and everything that I do, even interior design, right? Right. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. My professors in school used to say, you have to have a TV in your head. You have to be able to envision the room before it happens. And so I just, I don't know, I just get fascinated with the process of point A to point B. And then I'm fascinated with the purpose and omission statements and helping people. And there is something called, it's a Japanese concept
SPEAKER_01:called Ichigai. Oh, okay. Yeah. I wanted to talk about that. I was afraid to ask my question because I was not sure I could pronounce it. So yes, please tell us about this. Yes. Can you spell that out for our listeners?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, it is I-K. I have to see it in my
SPEAKER_01:name. Yeah, I know. I have it right here. I've been afraid to ask. Right. There we go.
SPEAKER_00:So it was steeped in their culture for centuries. And what it is, is it is what we're talking about, basically. Like, basically helping people know and figure out what they love, what their passion is, what their mission is, and what it can contribute to the world. what they can get paid for. Right. You know, and so it's basically, there's a little done biograph in the eye and it's figuring out what you love, what you can get paid for, what you can contribute to society, to the world, and basically what, what your mission
SPEAKER_01:is. And where does it come from? I, I missed that. So this is centuries old. Okay. In the Japanese culture. Oh, Japanese culture. Got it. Okay.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
UNKNOWN:Look at them.
SPEAKER_00:It was an article the other day that I think it was Toyota. And the article talked about how after World War II in Japan, the country just became a pretty wealthy country. And they became so focused on production and work that people now are just like, they're turned out and they're starting to work. You know, they're working more hours than they ever did. They're kind of losing that ikigai attitude. part of their culture of working towards their purpose and working towards their mission and contributing what they are good at into their society and into their community and a big part of Ikigai is harmony and community and so they're starting to see that and to see the problems that that's causing in their culture and so they're starting to incorporate back again that Ikigai that you know, helping people figure out the fluffy stuff. Right.
SPEAKER_01:It's not fluffy though. It's really, it's important in our lives. So you were saying Toyota is now using that framework to inspire their employees. That's great. Back then. That's
SPEAKER_00:huge. I found this ticket guy a long time ago. I've read, you know, different folks about it. And so I, I actually incorporate that into my work. balanced athlete and so I spoke about the vision statement boot camp but I'm working on creating a parent playbook and it's going to be a nine week coaching program for parents and teen athletes and I lead them through the whole process of it is leveled in with my vision statement boot camp so that is a prerequisite but once you know your personal mission statement. Then from there, we can figure out the, what you love, what you can contribute to the world, what your passion is, what your purpose is.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, well, I love that. And I know I will be contacting you when my kids are a little older and going through that course, because I think it will be just so great for all of us. My husband included, you know, just doing it as a whole family. Okay. Off the cuff here. And again, It might take you a minute to think. You sound like you are a big reader. Obviously, you're a big writer. Give us your top three to five books that you recommend everyone should read. It's good. It's good. Okay. So, Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life by Dr. Wayne Dyer.
SPEAKER_00:Change Your Thoughts, Change Your
SPEAKER_01:Life. Okay. I'm sorry I interrupted you. No,
SPEAKER_00:you're fine. And it's really almost like a daily devotional type thing, like a daily meditation thing. So it's broken up into small bits and pieces that you can read almost as like a daily devotional.
SPEAKER_01:Oh, I love those kind of books. They are so helpful, so easy to get through, you know, having it on your bedside table. You don't have to read much. It's not daunting. That is one that I haven't read. I will put that on number one. Yeah. Yeah,
SPEAKER_00:it's really good. And then I am a super fan of Kathy Heller. I don't know if you... know about her or have read any of her stuff or she has a podcast, but she has a book called Don't Keep Your Day Job. I've heard of that book. Answer Your Career. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely read it. If you want out too, that I actually, I ordered, I pre-ordered her art copy, so I haven't read it yet.
SPEAKER_01:This is great. I love giving my listeners and you're giving me new reads that I can't wait to dive into. Just something tangible to take away from the episode. I mean, we've given them already so much, but this is great. Okay. Maybe two or three more. I love it. Okay. Let's compete. Atomic Habits is good. That is one I have read. Yeah. Oh, sorry. No, no. I'm excited. You can say the F word. Yeah. Yeah. I love that because I've read that book. I have it on audio. But it's so funny because the title grabs you. But what the book is really about is giving a fuck and finding purpose. Right, exactly. So if you're thinking it's the opposite or basically what the title says, it's not. It's about doing... things for the right reasons and yes I love that book
SPEAKER_00:yeah and I won't make you that book like something like not give a fuck about anything right that's like that's a spy film like that's
SPEAKER_01:you're a psychopath I know he's very straightforward blunt and I love it yeah just so I'm not like making you stressed out let's hear one more that you would recommend or that you loved um
SPEAKER_00:is called Wabi Sabi. Oh, I like this. I haven't. Japanese. And it's Japanese is their point of perfectly imperfect life. Oh, I love that. Yeah. And so Wabi Sabi is a concept, I guess, it's like, have you ever seen those bases that are broken, but then they're like put back together again and then they put those like the gold. The gold, yeah. And they're more beautiful than they were. Yeah. Yeah. And so that's kind of the visual of Wabi Sabi. It's like, we're all broken, our bodies are not perfect, but it's supposed to be that
SPEAKER_01:way. Right, and it's almost a metaphor for failures. Each break is a failure, but you come back stronger and more beautiful after, in terms of a vase broken, and then it's mended with gold. So that's such a great, I'm glad you brought that up. I love that. Yeah. And do you have a book that you read about it in? Oh, it's called Wabi Sabi. Oh, great. And who is that by? Okay. Awesome. I love that. I will link all these in the show notes for you guys.
UNKNOWN:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Okay. So as Oh, yeah. No, me either. I know we've kind of covered this, but as I want to close with you, I want to know if one of our listeners is really feeling lost. Like maybe they can't even get themselves off the couch or out the door. They just are going through the motions of their life, maybe in a job they've outgrown or parenting teens who are changing so fast or stuck in a cycle of burnout. What is like one small... step they can take today towards discovering that purpose. And I have a feeling you're going to talk about mission statement. I love that. How, let's say they are just like solo. They can't even write that. Like what would be the first step you would give them? No.
SPEAKER_00:So there is another process that I think all of us go through. And I don't know if you've ever heard of Mr. Strangles. Yeah. Love his work. book. So, yeah, he's an Austrian psychiatrist and a Holocaust survivor. Right. And she came up with the concept of logotherapy. Logotherapy. You basically kind of map out, you kind of create a map of your heart shifts almost. Yeah. Of what, like, were your struggles, what you've gone through. And through that, That's where a lot of us find that meaning. Yeah. And so, you know, I'm going to read you something I wrote down about him because I just think it's so good. His beliefs are that humans are primarily driven by the search for meaning. His experience during the Holocaust, he discovered that those who can find deeper meaning and their suffering can transcend even the hardest of circumstances.
SPEAKER_01:Wow. The feeling in my stomach. I can't even describe it right now. It's so true, though. And I know this from experience I have. And it's true. So, yeah, I say for those people, like you're saying, kind of map out why you're feeling so down, why you're going through struggles and find the meaning in that and what you can bring to the world with all of this. Absolutely. That is powerful. I have chills. Seriously, goosebumps even. But it's been so lovely talking with you. And I think your program is just so unique. I think it's going to appeal to a wider audience than just parents and teen athletes. It is huge. And it doesn't just have to be about your health and wellness or anything. It is really about living a purpose-driven life. Thank you so much. And if you have anything else to say or share with us, I'd love to hear it.
SPEAKER_00:Pleasure holding you on your podcast. I'm just passionate about living a purposeful life. So if anybody wants to reach out, you can reach me through Instagram, through DMs.
SPEAKER_01:Well, I think you're going to do amazing things in this world and reach so many people. And I hope that you get a lot of calls and you're just living your purpose every single day. And one last question.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:If I'm a Jean could see you today, that's her grandmother that we spoke about in the beginning of the episode. I know if she could see you now, you know, in front of you holding your hands, what do you think she would say to you? Yeah, I love that. Actually, I have one story for you before we close. My grandfather was such an inspiration to me as well. He didn't go through the struggles, but as a family, we all came together for the first time in probably 20 years for his and my grandmother's 70th anniversary. And he had had colon cancer. He had cancer. you know, some stuff going on with his heart. He wasn't feeling well the whole time we were there. I was the very last cousin to leave. And as I'm walking out the door in his recliner, he just looked at me and said, just keep doing what you're doing. It's working. And he passed away hours after I left and it, it has stuck with me. And I just, you know, I think that there is some divine intervention where we have these experiences and, I was meant to hear those words. Those were really powerful to me. And just your whole story about your grandmother, she's inspiring you from out there somewhere. So I love that. Okay, well, I'm going to cry now. And on that note, I hope we can talk again. I'd love to discuss more about your process and everything. So we'll stay in touch and have you on again. Thank you guys again for showing up today, listening, and I would be grateful if you could rate and review this podcast or share it with someone who needs to hear it. Have a great day.
